Wonderful… it’s come at last--the ability to do—well, nothing. Oh, the freedom from all that daily grind. No more commuting to the office, rush hour traffic, or lunch time skirmishes in Sainsburys. I can do all the things I’ve ever wanted to do, but never had the time. I can go out on Sunday night knowing I don’t have to get up early Monday morning. I can cruise the department stores and browse the book shops forever without the need to get back and do something. I’ve got—Icanitis--what bliss.
Still can’t believe I’m free. I revel in the fact that I don’t have to wash and iron over the weekend. The housework can wait; I’ve got all the time in the world. I can have a relaxing breakfast and read the papers from cover to cover, fantastic. Now, what shall I do next? I know! I’ll read for a while, I’ve been meaning to get to Alice Walker’s latest for ages.
One Week Later…
My God! is that the time? Must get a move on…finish the books later--have to--have to what?
Have to nothing, stupid, you have Icanitis, remember?
So, I forgot for a minute--so what--I’m new at this game. Help, am I really talking to myself? Oh well, I suppose it’s all part of this Icanitis business. What's next? Oh yes, make a list of all the things I've ever wanted to do but never had the time.
Ok… that sounds good… let’s do it.
Wait! Have to go shopping first for pen and paper. I wonder why I always have to buy something, to do something.
This is the life. I’ve died and gone to heaven. I’ll have a slap up breakfast at the local cafe, overlooking the wonderful green rolling hills and valleys of the Chilterns. Then I can potter round the antique fairs dotted around the villages.
‘old up! Waxing a bit lyrical, aren’t you? Yeah, well what do you expect? I’ve never had nothing do before.
Now where was I? Ah yes…the list. Hmm, now… where did I put that note pad and pen? Right, item one. I could try art, there are a lot of fabulous views around here so… So what? Go and paint them.
Well, I’ll need a few things first, won’t I? Brushes, paint, one of those things to prop the canvas on. Ok, I get the picture, sounds like another shopping trip.
On the other hand I could learn to swim! You can’t breathe when you’re in water!
Keep fit? You can’t breathe and jump.
What about learning another language? You did French a while back, and you can’t remember a thing.
Surfing then? Are you completely gaga, how can you surf, if you can’t swim?
This is getting boring, hang gliding? You don’t like heights!
How about becoming a Buddhist monk? You’re the wrong gender, stupid!
A hippie then? No, you did that, years ago.
Ok, head’s out of the clouds, last try. What about writing? Yep, I can do that! Yesss…you don’t even have to shop for that, you’ve got pen, paper, everything you need.
Now what can I write about, hmm... I know, I can write something on retirement. Yeah, now you’re talking.